Pugly

Meet Pugly, I don't know his real name. I just sort of smashed together the words “pug” and “ugly.” How am I sure it is a “he” you ask? You will soon find out.

He is the neighbor's dog that regrettably stays leashed under their villa's carport all day. He has a habit of knocking over his water dish and then hyper-actively snorting and barking until someone (usually me or one of my roomates) goes and fills it back up. So this morning I was walking to my car and could hear the characteristic snorting that has become synonymous with my waking hours. Except this time there was a sight, much sadder than just a dog with an empty water dish...

As you can see, our friend Pugly has what we call in medicine, a “custodio-centric auto-erotic asphyxiation” fetish (not bad for making it up on the fly huh? He's one sick puppy...ok ok I'll quit, it was just there I had to). Disgusted and appalled by this, there was only one thing I could do. I laughed and took a couple of pictures. Of course I took the broom away, filled his dish with water and then started to leave for school. I THOUGHT I had put the object of pugly's affection far enough out of reach but alas, I took this one out of my window as I drove off.

So this afternoon after class, I had errands to run. You can't run errands on the weekends because everything is closed. The same goes for anytime after 3:30 pm.....and also 11-1 pm.... and well, just whenever the hell St. Maartener's feel like they don't want to be bothered with you. Regardless, I had to get my car inspected, get a haircut, and get groceries. The car inspection went OK I guess. I went through, he told me my tint was too dark, that it failed inspection, and that I owed him $21 dollars. Then he peeled the tint off, kindly told me I owed him another $10 to “re-inspect it,” I was sure to throw in a “yeah, ok....aaaaannd... you're serious....” over the top of my sunglasses as I handed him the last 10 dollar bill in my wallet. What can you do... Then I went to Grande Marche', probably this island's biggest asset

Its a lot like an Albertson's or a Kroger, the prices really aren't that far off the mark from those places either. I got the essentials: Diet Pepsi, orange juice, some frozen chicken breasts, Febreeze, bread, etc. Fellow Louisianians will be interested to know that they also carry some Zatarain's products and even Tony's Roux Mix (but sadly not the seasoning), I also bought some of these there, it says they're made in Gramercy, Louisiana (same co. as Zapp's?). I guess it's a small world after all.

New living arrangements beginning in August

"Well Mr. Leonards, thank you for interviewing for the position of resident advisor, do you have any questions?"

"Yes as a matter of fact. What did the cannibal say to his cannibal friend when they ate a clown?"

"I don't know, what?"

"Does this taste funny to you?"

((slaps desk and laughs out loud))

"...."

"...."

((clears throat))

"sooo...."

"Yeah.....anyway....Thanks again for coming in"

"How will you inform me of a decision?"

"public flyer."

"makes sense."

"thanks"

So that's not exactly how it went, anyone who knows me knows I have a tendency to take a few creative liberties with my stories for art's sake. All joking aside, I did interview for the position and it went very well (obviously); I did see the flyer on a door before I checked my email so that was pretty funny. So I'm pretty excited about this, I'll be living on campus, 30 seconds from class basically, no utilities, half price rent, private room, you really can't beat that deal, in fact I may be able to hire a maid once a week with the money I'm saving. The only downside is that it will curtail my time I get to spend back in the states this break, like down to 4 days, which hurts. But nothing is free and nothing is promised. On the upside, I really enjoy helping people just getting to the island, I know how scared and bewildered I was, I showed up with two suitcases and a post-it note with a crude map of where I was to stay. That's it. My whole life had led up to the point where I cut the cord on everything else and started from scratch with a post it note... When I stepped out into Princess Juliana Airport that day I stood there with my bag not really knowing what to do or where the exit was. If you were standing close enough, you may have heard me mumble something to the effect of "I want my mom..." OK that was a little dramatic too, but it is scary, you don't even know where to get a loaf of bread, the cab drivers scowl at you and tell you to hurry up, you don't have a phone, its nuts. So it makes sense to help people out, what might take me 5 minutes might give them alot of reassurance and save alot of time. Anyway, here's some pictures of what will be my new home in a couple of months and of school that I took from the basketball court.

Strange Noises at Night

The great concrete skeletons of what were once high-dollar vacation properties now stand veiled in shrubs and young trees just yards from school. Destroyed by a category 5 hurricane over 10 years ago, and still locked in litigation over insurance, they silently disappear behind a green curtain. Recently however, there have been rumblings in the online AUC forum of strange noises, loud “bangs!” from the enchanted bungalow forest late in the night.

Some have suggested a homeless man, perhaps drunk on Mt. Gay Rum. Others have suggested a gay mountain-man, perhaps homeless. Even stranger, there has long been a myth at AUC of a small monkey that appears sporadically that may be the culprit. Here, for the first time an AUC student has captured a picture of the bombastic beast on his blue bordered balcony:

But look, LOOK CLOSELY, this is no ordinary monkey. This is a monkey who can effectively discombobulate the spacetime continuum, this is...A FUTURE APE!



At this time it is unclear how this homosapian traveler of space and time gets around, current theories by prominent AUC guards in the guard shack suggest that maybe he travels in a phone booth with Abe Lincoln or perhaps a delorean modified to run on garbage. The theory goes on to suggest that perhaps the noises are a result of him working on his stainless steel 80's icon under the cover of night...mon. This may explain the missing car door handles mentioned in Paul Kyser's blog. Another opinion from a highly respected student was “Dude he probably just, like, f'd up his date settings on his camera or something, youre an idiot, youre taking this way too far, are you recording me? Cut it ou....” I will be sure to report any new developments.

I slipped on one of the tile inlays in our sidewalk on sunday, don't worry, I caught myself by supporting my full body weight on the corner, ehem, medial-distal aspect, of my toe. Of course by monday night it was REALLY infected despite my best efforts to keep it cleaned and bandaged. So its 500 mg augmentin 3 times a day for me.

Other than that, Ive been doing well in school. One of our physiology profs had a "minor" stroke and was flown to Boston for treatment, we all hope he has a swift and satisfactory recovery. His temporary replacement was a Dr. McCumbee, an endocrinologist from Marshall University Medical School.

his arch nemesis is Gargamel.(I told Adam I would credit him for the pictures and observation but that I wouldn't mention the video of "smurf porn" he sent me so I won't talk about it) The guy really knows his stuff, he seems extremely detail oriented. We will see how much of that carries over into his exams on Friday. Other than that, its been pretty routine, here's a picture of me leaving the house to go tutor in the anatomy lab.

Reduvids, the Bam Margeras of the insect world...

In med micro this morning we learned of a disease who's vector is an insect known as a reduvid. In some developing countries these insects live in the walls and come out just before dawn. They crawl up the side of your face, they admire the docile, peacful look on your face while you lay there. They smile as they imagine you dreaming of winged ponies and fairytales, floating on clouds and getting a toy train for Christmas. Such a serine setting... Then they bite the crap out of your eye. As you wince and begin dreaming of falling face first onto a no. 2 pencil they go ahead and take a big dump right there in the corner of your eye just to be an asshole, If I'm correct they turn around and smear some in the open wound they just created so that the disease causing protozoans in it can have better access. I have said it before and I'll say it again, these bugs cannot be trusted. The last time I let a reduvid house-sit I came home to find my car on blocks and the inside filled to the roof with Quisp cereal, I don't even know what Quisp is; and on top of that they turned my livingroom into a skate park.

It's been pretty stormy here lately, I was lucky enough to catch the lightning with my camera the other night (click to enlarge).

Storms to the North

Thunderstorms last night, spent my Saturday doing laundry, studying pathology and making spaghetti, had a chance to snap these from my balcony.

Around school

Just some pictures of school I took on my lunchbreak.